Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Giant squid invade San Diego’s shores

We are about to get in the car (well in four hours, but I am already starting to sweat as only one of the five of us are packed...pretty normal for how I roll) anyways, we are about to leave for a trip. We are meeting Gavin's family in San Diego at the beach. Here is where we stay:

We get to see all of the cousins...and when I say "all of the cousins", I mean ALL of the cousins because my siblings don't have kids. Although my stepsisters do...and we call my cousin's kids their "cousins"...but you get the point. These are also all cousins who don't live close to us, so it is a real treat for my kids to get to play with them.

As I just got out of the shower, I thought to myself "This is the last time that I will be sand-free for the next week." I like the beach...I don't LOVE it. I like stepping on sand, and laying on a towel that is on top of sand. I don't like sand in my hair, or clothes. I don't like HOT sand, and I don't like dirty sand. I especially don't like sand that is littered with sea weed the size of a gigantic squid...and speaking of:

I like having the kids make sandcastles, and bury each other in the sand. I don't like kids flinging sand at each other, causing sand to wind up in the their eyes which therefore cause me to try to wash out their eyes without causing cornea damage. I like people-watching. Oh, that is fun. I don't love doing the kid-watching. Don't misunderstand. When they are buried up to their head...or catching a wave at their surf lesson...that I love to watch. I don't like 24 hour lifeguard duty where I am one step away from an anxiety attack, trying to keep an eye on three little people going in three different directions in a virtual sandbox that stretches for a zillion miles with the constant threat of:

A) rip tides
B) jelly fish
C) drunk boogie boarders and
D) perverts on the prowl

oh yeah...and now aggressive squid attacks. This is where the pool is more up my alley. They are fenced. They are free of wildlife. There are roped off shallow areas and there is still really good people-watching...although definitely not as good as the beach.

I love G-strings. I guess because in a million-zillion years I will probably never wear one, know any one that wears one, or even see one in my state. It's really remarkable that two butt cheeks can just hang out with a little piece of floss as their accessory. Usually the girls that wear them can only do so because they have butt cheeks that look like bouncy balls. I on the other hand, would look like I had two extra large sausage patties fighting over a piece of floss.

I also like to see men in Speedos. Although, in San Diego most of the men that wear Speedos definitely should not be. But it's the same men who get hair plugs and drive muscle you can forgive them, because they have standards to live up to.

We are bringing a sitter this year. That better mean that this year I spend enough time on my belly, knee-deep in people magazines to:

A) get a tan
B) find out what really did happen to John and Kate Plus 8.

May post from the beach...or I may just be so in to my magazines and cold drinks that I put it off till I am back in the Promised Land.


Elisabeth said...

Yay! Have a great trip Ashley!

Janice {Run Far} said...

OMG... I love your blog. I love the way your write.

have fun on your trip.

Anonymous said...

Hey, Hope you do get to the bottom of John and Kate +8, fill me in on all the details when you get back home. I expect you to be very tan and ready to party for your birthday.

Love ya.
David (your brother!)