Saturday, June 14, 2008

The Light At The End Of The Tunnel

OK, I think I am going to survive. It was a little iffy there for a while. But I finally realized something that saved me...It is OK for a baby to cry.
Why do I not remember this from my other two kids? My pediatrician said "No baby ever died from crying". And while it is a sound that I would rather not EVER hear, it is OK. Garrett was super fussy, and my solution was always the bottle or the boob. So I am scrambling to make him a bottle the other day, after he had sucked the life out of me, and he is wailing his little head off. My friend said, "Aren't newborn cries just the cutest?" My response "UM...NO." My kids are shrieking, hollering, yowling, yelping, wailers... Must be the survival instinct. And it is not gradual. From the moment they wake, there's about a .5 second pause before the shrieks begin. So Garrett is wailing his guts out and I am racing to make this bottle, just feeling horrible that the poor kid is having a half a second of discomfort in his puny existence, when he abruptly stops. I thought he might have died. Nope- he was asleep...HALLELUJAH! I know how he feels. Sometimes you just got to let it out, and have a good little cry before bed. So, for the past two and a half weeks I have been completely overwhelmed, but now I think I will survive. And it is good to know that even with a few tears, Garrett will survive too.

15 comments:

Chip & Lisa said...

I have one thing to say- Hallaluya!!! And about the mom forgetting thing- do you think that is all part of God's plan for the world to be populated or we might all just stop with one. All I know is it does keep getting better the older they get. I always love your spin on motherhood.

Charlotte said...

Starting at about 2-3 weeks up until about 7 weeks, our Charlie was REALLY fussy. I probably would have gone crazy had I not read the book "The Happiest Baby on the Block." The book's 4-step calming solution worked well, but what REALLY saved me was the little tip in there to try different things that make noise. Charlie LOVES the sound of the blowdryer - still! I still can't get over how it calms him down almost immediately.

Danielle and Cameron Hatch said...

congrats to you as well! it seems like just yesterday we were having lunch in boston and now you've got three adorable kids. good luck with the baby crying, i feel your pain, their little bodies are all lungs :)

Kati said...

ASHLEY! I saw your comment on Cami's blog! Look at you and your 3 kids! We have a blog too...but it is private, so email me at littlebitoflove76@gmail.com and I will send you an invite. So great to catch up with you! I can't believe your son is 7!!!! Hope to hear from you!
Kati Price

Amber said...

Ashley, i just found out you have a blog. It is so great to keep up with you. Motherhood is the hardest and greatest thing you will ever do. Just know you are not in it alone! Those that have been there totally understand when you have not gotten out of you PJ's for days. And those that are jugemental will come back years later after their first child has kept them up all night and they can't find the time to brush their teeth, just to say they were sorry and ask if you have any advice! If you every need to vent give me a call, there is a good chance I have been there and I will have pure empathy. As you look at Garrett and then to Dalton you can see how quickly time will go. Enjoy the small moments and it is ok to shut the door on a crying baby for a few minutes! My best advice...a happy mom makes a happy baby. Do what it takes, to take care of you.

Amber Coglianese

Kristen said...

Hang in there! I think you are the best mom ever! In fact I think you should have atleast 5 or 6 more...

Dan K Shaw said...

Hang in there I know it is hard but it does get easier. You are the best Mom and we love you!!

Ashley Eddington Hoopes said...

Hi all, Thanks for your words of encouragement. Tonight was my first night "on my own" with the kids. Gavin is in Boston, and my mom decided to see if we would stay alive without her. I am happy to report that we ARE still alive..yeah!

Amber- you are AMAZING! How do you do it?? Really, I have NO idea...can't even comprehend.

So, here is how I managed my first night alone with three kids:

#1: We had leftovers for dinner. (I overcooked the broccoli, so we had NO vegetables.)

#2: I gave the baby a bottle for his night feeding so that I could read Dalton and Shelby their bedtime stories. (Baby still needed to be burped, so Dalton read Shelby her story...thanks D!)

#3 No baths, even though Shelby drew all over her arm with blue marker today, and then tried to lick off the evidence, so she looks like blue beard, AND she licked her desert bowl clean so she has chocolate pudding on her forehead and nose.

So the kids are in bed (have been since 8:40 p.m., it is now 9:38 p.m. and Shelby is STILL NOT ASLEEP, but better than her running around the house.

Wish me luck that the night goes as smoothly...ie: BABY SLEEPING THROUGH THE NIGHT!! (yeah right, or just sleeping for more than three hours in a row). :)

karen said...

That third one is the kicker, eh? I remember many a nervous breakdown with Ellison, even when Marc was HOME. Thankfully Charlotte was much less of a fussy baby. I always wanted to hire a night nurse so we (OK, I) could sleep through JUST ONE NIGHT. But alas, it was not meant to be, since they're like $2000 per night or something. I suppose my mom could quit her job for a month and come live with me for that price, right? Chuckling pretty hard about that Shelby Lynn.

emily said...

Ashley, you are great!! Just reading your blog makes me sweat remembering the days when I was right where you are. It gets better, much better. Ryan used to go out of town quite often when mine where little and I remember thinking, "if I can just make it through the night and have 30 minutes of peace, it will be success!" My favorite part was when they actually finally fell asleep and I would go in their rooms and hear them breath deep and think how sweet they are.

Then they always would wake in the morning and it would begin all over again!! I hated people that said they loved babies, because babies are so hard. I would give birth to an 18 month old if I could have. Anyway, you are great and doing great. My only advice, when things get hard, takes things in small sections. Instead of making it through the day, just make it through breakfast and then plan how to make it through the next few hours. It helps to split up your day a little smaller. I always think that way you have a lot more victories at the end of the day!

The Jones' said...

Hey Ashley, we will be there on july 23rd just in time to celebrate your bday, Is it the big 30, maybe next year. Anyhow we will be there for two and half weeks, so tell dalton, shelby and garrett to get ready for an exciting time. No we did not buy a condo and we are homeless....the joys of living in boston. talk soon. how are you holding up, hope all is well amy

The Jones' said...

How nice to go to san diego and know that the flight is only an hour. I am not looking forward to the long flight with Brax not that he is walking. Anyhow we will definitely call you the minute we get in so I can meet this little guy.

Dan K Shaw said...

Ashley you are the best. I am amazed at how you can step back and see the world and put everything in persective and still deal with everything minute by minute. You are doing and awsume job. If I can help let me know. Love you guys.

The Jones' said...

Hey I just wanted to find out more about Dalton's summer, especially up at the JCC, can I register Chandler for that while we are there? I am right now trying to see if I can get him swim lessons. Everything still going okay? I will try to call you so we can work things out for when we come/amy

Jared and Delia said...

Oh my goodness. You are making me remember how horrified I was to have a newborn. It makes me want the next couple of months to go slowly!

Thank goodness they are the cutest things in creation right? And Garrett IS adorable by the way.

I feel for you.